FAILED FOREIGN POLICY

FAILED FOREIGN POLICY

Sometimes we all choose to believe something is real, even though intellectually we know it isn’t so. Some times we just want to believe in something and allow it to pass our reality test, and at other times it’s just good honest fun. Most of the time, its harmless for us to perpetuate these myths and go about of lives in the real world. So, I’ll give a pass to all of you who believe in Wrestling, Santa Claus, and the Easter bunny.

However, we clearly lost the recent contest of wills with the North Koreans. They announced they were going to launch a “communications” satellite and we postured up and told them we would shoot it down. We bandied about some other strongly worded political rhetoric and then sat back and watched as the North Koreans did what they wanted to do. They knew the odds were strongly in their favor because we had backed down on the much larger nuclear proliferation contest already. Not to mention the fact that we prosecuted a half won war there many years ago that we are still supporting with troops.

To make matters worse they threatened us and the world community with superlatives as to their retaliation if we tried to interfere.( their bluff worked). We retracted our own statement regarding shooting down the missile, and of course they took that as intrinsic permission to move ahead. There is no doubt that their regime gathered important scientific data that will enhance their ability to launch an intercontinental ballistic missile at the U.S. (giving them even more tactical and political capital to use against us at the next showdown). We could have stopped the missile pre-flight or had our Japanese Allies shoot it down (we have given them the means to do so). There is no question in my mind that they will both use, and export this technology to our enemies. (some have bombs and no delivery systems, others have delivery systems and no bombs.. go fish)

I think what concerns me most is when we incorporate this “wishful” thinking into our foreign policy. When we knowingly accept the word and propaganda of another country that intends to do us harm. I get upset when we are being intellectually dishonest with our self and the American people, in matters that concern national security. The worst part is we do it over and over again, with every despot and half baked dictator around the world. What naiveté, “Come on, let’s not make waves”, maybe they really are doing what they are telling us.

There is a game that children pay called “Mother May I”. In the game the children all stand obediently in a line before the all knowing “mother”. One at a time they each ask mother for permission to take a step forward. Mother plays a strategic game allowing each to make some forward progress, some by baby steps and some by giant steps (based on how pleased Mom is with each of their behaviors and how eloquently they each ask for permission.) But, Old Mom is no fool, she knows that if she allows one participant too many steps forward, they will eventually “catch” her. To insure she stays in power, Mom appears gracious in her allocation of small successes, but in the end always sends the advancing participants back to the starting line. It’s great fun as a kid’s game, but is this the way for us to conduct ourselves on the world political stage?

It seems to me that all the world leaders that would threaten and defy the United States and the world community all know how to play this game, very well. They have learned the game of patience; they know that the leadership of the United States will play by the rules. They move forward with their destructive agenda and allow us some small successes along the way. As we get closer to making any real progress they cry foul and send us back to the starting line. The whole time these devious leaders have no real intention of complying with our wishes or objectives, as they slowly make progress to their ultimate goals.

Two steps forward and one step back, appearing to comply or feigning the desire to negotiate, while inching ever slightly towards their ultimate objective with each passing day. ( Insert the Iranian nuclear contest of wills here) They allow us to rejoice in our perceived diplomatic momentum, offering us just enough apparent success to keep us in the game. (and avoid the penalty phase). These rouge governments also realize that we have allies and detractors in the United Nations and the world community. They alternately seek approval from one sympathetic ear and then the other, much as a child that was told not to do something by one parent.

How foolish our efforts truly must appear in their eyes as they play a careful and well calculated game of cat and mouse. They know that time and public opinion will dilute the resolve and attention span of the American people. We are always so willing to trust and forget the lessons of the past. While we couch our foreign policy statements in carefully constructed, politically ambiguous, and correct terms they threaten us with blatant and inflammatory statements and threats of retaliation.

We adulterate our demands with the use of politically correct language such as “ We are leaving all options on the table” (a watered down reference to the possible use of force), or we may need to take “extreme measures”. Of course, none of these veiled threats ever deter the “evil doers” from their mission at hand. For a threat to be effective, you have to occasionally back that threat with action. Our enemies know that we are a paper tiger, and rarely if ever, back a diplomatically correct “threat” with any action. They also know that we are increasingly reluctant to act unilaterally, and God forbid acting preemptively to defuse a threat. (We need to learn a lesson from our friends in Israel) Those that would defy us and do us harm, realize that we would first go to the United Nations or try to form a coalition before taking any action.

Over time when you don’t say what you mean, and mean what you say, you loose creditability. When you loose creditability you loose the “fear factor” and perhaps more importantly, also the ability to “bluff”. In any negotiation, when you loose the ability to bluff, you are left with only a few options including walking away with your tail between your legs and all out war.

We need to revamp our foreign policy and regain our international creditability. I think the reputation we need to portray to the world is that we are fair, but tough. We need to lead with diplomacy, but not rely solely on it. Mostly we need to be consistent in our demands and expectations so that others can tell where we really stand on matters of national and global security.

Remember, there are others out there who would doubt our intentions and our resolve. There are many who will confuse our compassion for weakness. It’s vital that we respond to threats and intimidating gestures with the right posture, and measure reactions, the World is watching.

Please feel free to contact me at: pooritalianboy@gmail.com

P.I.B.

SHIPWRECK POLITICS

SHIP WRECK POLITICS
“ Not a joke..I wish it was..”

So…a cruise ship wrecks out at sea and only a few life boats make it away from the ship. This story is about 13 people from one life boat that survive. After 3 torturous days at sea they end up on a desert island in the pacific.( I love desert island stories..see my article “The Lost Island- December ‘08“ ) The first day is frantic and they all band together to search the island and look for food and shelter. After the week or so, the group seems to break off and naturally gravitate into small groups based on like personalities.

As luck would have it there were 6 groups, each with two participants, as follows:

2 Bums (correct that: Ambitiously Challenged Gentlemen)
2 Construction Workers
2 Successful Businessmen (currently between jobs)
2 Cops (sorry, Law Enforcement Officers)
2 Bankers
2 Politicians

2 Indians (Not really…I’m just kidding..that was the Village People)

(No.. This isn’t a Noah’s Ark type parable)

If the group was to survive there was a lot of work to do and it was important that everyone pitched in. The island was rich in natural resources that could help sustain life for the castaways if they were willing to work hard and stick together. There were huts and shelters to build, fires to start and food and water to gather. The main food sources were fish and turtle eggs. At first everyone worked together, it was one for all and all for one, as the desperate situation made a common bond between all the inhabitants of the island. But soon tempers flared and everyone was in a very defeatist mood.

After a few weeks, the sense of hope was diminishing and some of the natural food, water, and low hanging fruit was becoming harder and harder to obtain. Rivalries and animosities had been arising between the once close castaways. It was clear that something had to be done to insure the future of the group. Each group heads off to a separate part of the beach to strategize and determine how they would survive until they were rescued.

The 2 bums (sorry, Politically correct version: Hutless People) began discussing their fate over some 100 proof, fermented coconut milk. (from their crude still) Let’s do as little as possible and claim that we are too drunk to do any meaningful work, those other suckers can carry the load. Why should we work any harder here than we did back home. Besides we have our coconut brew, and as many fish as we care to eat. The weather is warm and the nights are mild, why spend the energy to build a hut. I’m beginning to think I could get to like this place, this is really living.

The 2 construction workers also talked among themselves: Listen, you and I have the skills to build the huts, and make the tools that everyone needs. We can get recognition from the group and maybe they will remember our hard work when we finally get rescued. We might even get a job offer from someone when we get home. Besides, we are getting bored by just sitting around.

The 2 cops also talked privately. Have you noticed how edgy everyone is getting; I think they really need us to help keep the peace. We don’t have any weapons but we are both big guys trained in self defense, we can help keep the group acting peacefully and even punish those that don’t. I suggest that one of us works on gathering food for the group during the day and then patrol the island at night, while the other works the opposite schedule. We can best protect and serve the community by doing this.

The bankers had the construction guys build them a very solid hut that abutted to a cave that was etched into the islands only mountain. Here they could help the people by safely storing their excess coconuts, shells, and valuables (for a fee of course). They could also profit by lending out some of these assets to others in need (for 18% interest of course)

The 2 doctors met for tea in their large and spacious thatch hut. (Doctors will be doctors). The older physician told the younger one. We are two well educated men, we shouldn’t be doing all this manual work. The health of many of our fellow passengers is beginning to deteriorate. Some are suffering from insect bites, sunburn, and stomach disorders from too much coconut milk. I suggest we trade our medical services in lieu of our manual labor. Since we are the only doctors on the island, let’s raise our rates to 2 coconuts per office visit. (and make our patients wait in crowded waiting huts) We can live a good life here by doing this.

The two businessmen had a long discussion about their situation and had mapped out a business plan and a few alternate plans. Their vision was to not only survive but prosper on the island. The business men were willing to work long hours and do whatever was necessary, but only if they could begin to amass some extra creature comforts for themselves at the end of a few months. They would not be satisfied with the very basics of survival; they wanted more and were willing to work for it. In fact they also had a plan to obtain options on the island’s real estate and to bring tourism to the island when they were eventually rescued.

The last group consisted of two seasoned politicians. They wanted to be seen by the others as the leaders of the island. They proposed an election to instate them into power. The politicians realized that they would have to find a way to pander to each of the constituency groups on the island to get their votes.

Being politicians they felt a certain sense of entitlement. This whole island situation was great for big government. The less the people have, the more they feel they need government. The political types felt that they knew what was in the best interests of all the others (even more so than the individuals themselves). They also felt that several of the individuals were obtaining a better lifestyle than the others and this needed to be corrected.

It was vital that they charged the others “taxes” because, as we all know the government can not operate or give away money to social programs unless they first take it from their constituents. They also decided that it didn’t really matter which of the two got elected because it was really a vote for the same ideals, and the other guy would win the next election based on a promise to “change”. Here are some highlights from their plan:

The Doctor’s large hut was unacceptable; they needed to treat all the islanders the same and even work for free. Anyone needing health care would have to seek permission from the government (that enhances the government’s power over the individual). The doctors should only be paid 2 coconuts a month without regard to how many patients they cared for (tropical medicare)

The Business men were accumulating too much “wealth”, they needed to be taxed and have their wealth “re-distributed”. These guys are evil because they seek to profit from their work. Besides we need funds to help the others who choose to work less.

The Bums (sorry, less fortunate people) should not live outside in the old cardboard boxes from the boat, they should have at least as nice of a hut as the construction workers (but not as nice as the bankers or ours of course). They too need the basics of life, such as indoor plumbing, swing hammocks, and a big screen T.V. ( Ok..its an island, I caught that one).

The Cops should work tirelessly for the politicians and help enforce any law or decision that we make. ( Yes..even the stupid ones). These guys work hard and pay their taxes. Tell them we will give them a gold watch when we get off the island.

By the way, the Construction Guys should work for the government at least 2 days a week for free building government buildings and would have to come and get permission from us before they could build anything else (and pay for a permit to do so)

Let’s not forget our friends the Bankers, they are having a rough time with so few customers on the island so let’s throw them some bail-out money. We can’t let them go under

Oh, by the way..the Politicians decided to outlaw the harvesting of turtle eggs, because they are an endangered species (of course, so are the islanders at this point). They also decided to make half the tiny island off limits to the others ( the side that held most of the fresh water) to preserve it as a bird sanctuary. (Hey..birds are people too….and they need there space )

Well, there you have it. Our islanders are all making due with the cards they have been dealt. Looks like a pretty pathetic situation, I’m just glad I’m back here on the main land where we do things differently ????

As a footnote: The 13th passenger was a Poor Italian Boy. He built a small raft the 1st day on the island and drifted for 2 days with the current. He ended up on another small island where 12 women from the professional women’s beach Volleyball league had landed with their lifeboat and he is reportedly living very happily…

Please feel free to contact me at: pooritalianboy@gmail.com

P.I.B.

THE MARCH TOWARDS SOCIALISM

THE MARCH TOWARDS SOCIALISM

“The problem with socialism is that you eventually run out of other people’s money”
Margaret Thatcher

First of all, I want it to be clear that I am a dyed in the wool Capitalist. (What a surprise). I subscribe to this line of thinking because I think that most of the world’s problems and darn near all of its opportunities are best addressed by good old fashioned American Capitalism.

That being said, I think this country is marching inextricably towards socialism. The funny thing is that almost everyone knows it’s the wrong direction to go, yet we find ourselves marching, no racing, to the same inevitable conclusion. (Maybe if we close our eyes and don’t acknowledge it as socialism, it will be somehow better)

I have to admit that I’m at a loss to explain the deep seated need to continue on this path, especially when history and world events warn us ..”Do Not Enter”. Perhaps we secretly feel that we don’t really deserve the prosperity and life style that we now enjoy. It is our solemn duty to self destruct by moving away from capitalism and into the waiting arms of socialism. Or perhaps, maybe we are in a 200 year cycle that swings from left to right. Maybe Al Gore can tell us, it is as inevitable as “Global Warming”. With all joking aside, I feel that by inching towards socialism, we are heading towards a “Financial and Political Ice Age”.

At the very root of the problem, the forces that are “driving the bus” down this slippery slope are Government, Taxes, and Dependence.

Big Government: to the extent that it needs socialism to help perpetuate itself. Quite simply the more people that are dependent on the government, the more power and money that government is afforded.

Taxes: Are the tool that the government uses to feed the fire of socialism. Since government does not create any wealth on its own, it used the tax system to create funds and distribute (actually re-distribute) wealth. We (the government) know better how to use these funds than the people who created the wealth. They can not be trusted to be the executors of their own destinies. Take from the rich and give to the poor….sound familiar?

Dependence: (as in the opposite of independence) In the simplest terms, the American public is becoming more dependent on the government, politicians, and the health care system. Rather than solving our own problems we are looking for assistance. The current huge bailout programs will make us more indebted and beholden, to an ever more powerful and intrusive government.

Is socialism something to be feared? Not necessarily. Is it something to be avoided? Most definitely. Socialistic programs are designed to help people, to take care of people, but at what cost? In my mind it is like grading an exam on a curve. No one really looks bad, or is allowed to fail, but it also rewards mediocrity and puts everyone at the same level.

There are many well meaning politicians that espouse these views, they want to help the masses, and they have good intentions. It’s also been said that the road to hell is paved with good intentions. Many of these same politicians are extremely wealthy individuals. They have made their fortunes under the capitalistic system and a turn towards socialism will have little effect on their fortunes or that of their heirs.

I caution you that this road we are taking, will lead us to a place that is not good for our country. The consequences of our actions today can not be easily reversed. We need to carefully reconsider what we term as basic human rights and entitlements. Let’s not become a population lulled to sleep with government programs, handouts and easy solutions. Let us avoid an ever increasing tax on the finite and dwindling base of productive individuals and companies. If we ignore the warnings and persist on this path, we will break the back of American Capitalism, and in doing so, rob future generations of the prosperous and free America we all grew up in.

Please feel free to contact me at pooritalianboy@gmail.com

P.I.B.

AMERICAN WAY

AMERICAN WAY

“We are still a country of immigrants, some of us have just been here a little longer than others”P,I,B.

I feel qualified to address this subject because I am the son of a son, of an Italian Immigrant.

Few things stir my heart like the stories of the American Immigrant, the architects of these United States. They had so little, often arriving here with only a few personal possessions, yet they have given and shared so much. Most Americans can easily trace our roots to the first of our relatives that made their way to the United States. They came here from every country, from every corner of the world to our shores. When I look back at the old pictures of immigrants as they arrived at Ellis Island, I can see a look relief, of expectation, and of hope in their eyes. They had reached their new home.

Everyone used to call the Unites States the “Great Melting Pot”, and it was. People from all over the world would risk everything just to come to our shores. Here they expected to find liberty, opportunity, financial success, and religious freedom.

These people left everything they ever knew behind to take a chance on this country. Many left friends, family, homes, and their way of life. They came here to share in the “American Dream”, however they also brought their skills, their ambitions, their hopes and dreams. Many of them succeeded beyond their wildest dreams when their hard work and imagination were turned loose on a vast and hungry new nation destined for greatness.

The truth is that America was called the “Great Melting Pot” because these people from all over the world came here to be Americans. Yes they honored and preserved the important parts of their individual cultures, but they gladly learned our language, our laws, and our ways. They Pledged their allegiance to our country and to our Flag, to our nation, their new home. With their sweat they helped build and shape this country. They help build our roads, our infrastructure, railroads, and our great bridges. Their contributions, their strengths and talents are what made this country great.

Today, I’m afraid that America is moving away from being the “Great Melting Pot”. We are moving from a homogonous mix of peoples to a multi-cultured and fractured society. Many people entering this country today are arriving illegally. They are not here to melt in with American’s ways. They want to retain their language, their ways, and their loyalties. We should all be proud of our past and our heritage; but put the emphasis on being Americans first and foremost. Especially today, we need more things that bind us together and fewer things that separate us. Unfortunately some are not here to bring their individual skills and contributions to make an even better America; they are here only to take from this great country. Worse yet some are here not to build us up, but to tear us down.
Instead of learning and adapting to our beliefs, ways and laws, they want us to learn and adapt to their beliefs, laws, and ways. Instead of “melting in” and becoming one with us, they want to separate us from them, and them from us. This is not the formula that made this country great. Our diversity has made us strong but our ability to assimilate these cultures has made us great.

We need to control our immigration and make sure that people who arrive here are here for the right reasons. All new immigrants should learn our language, our history, and our laws. People entering this country should bring a skill, willingness to work and study, they should pledge their allegiance. Their presence should strengthen American, not siphon off from it. If new entrants are not willing to assimilate, then we should not be willing to admit them. Period…

I think that once we enforce the proper policy for immigration, we can then open our borders once again, and attract the best and brightest, the hardest workers, the students and the dreamers of the world. Each group that has come here has made huge contributions to our nation and to our culture, in the form of art, science, literature, music, and sports. This mix, this random cocktail of peoples from around the globe, has helped make the United States the greatest country in the world. The glue that holds us together is not their wealth, but their burning desire to contribute and to be free.

"Give us your poor, your tired, your huddled masses longing to be free..."
I lift my lamp beside the golden door!"
THE STATUE OF LIBERTY

With each passing generation, we leave our foreign roots farther behind, not to be forgotten but to be part of our heritage. The heritage of our children, and our children’s children as they celebrate being true Americans.

Please feel free to contact me at: pooritalianboy@gmail.com

Also see my article: “An Immigrants Story”
P.I.B.

HOW TO REBUILD AMERICA

HOW TO REBUILD AMERICA
“One Brick at a Time”

If you read my previous article: “The Demise of America”, you realize that I believe our country has taken a wrong turn. In many cases, America is in a state of decline, both economically, politically, and morally. I feel that to begin our recovery, we need to first acknowledge our mistakes and misdeeds.

I love this country and I know we can reverse the damage we have done, however, we must begin the process in earnest and we must begin now. It’s important that we do not underestimate the size and complexity of the job we have before us, nor the amount of commitment and effort that will be required. This rebuilding initiative will be a monumental task, accomplished “one brick at a time”.

This task is too important to leave solely to our elected officials. To propel our country to new heights of greatness will require a grass roots effort by all Americans. The job is simply too big for the congress or even the president to tackle alone. I think president Obama, would welcome the help and support of all Americans. In addition, we need to make our elected officials painfully aware that nothing, short of their full attention and cooperation on this effort will be acceptable

As I mentioned, there is a lot of work to be done on many fronts, but here is my

Top Ten “starter” list:
(in no particular order)

Partisan politics: This country was founded on Political debate and tolerance for different points of view. My concern is that the constituents are so divided on most issues that it’s hard to get a consensus. The two party system seems to have drifted to the far left and far right, leaving the centrist to choose between the best of two evils. Sometimes, after an election, I get the feeling that the names have changed, and the balance of power has shifted, but that we are in for more of the same. We may need a solid Third party to offer some balance (maybe the “freedom party”)

Welfare state: Government is not our surrogate mother. I believe in helping people in need, not creating a needy class of people. Our government can not, and should not, be responsible for cradle to grave care for otherwise self sufficient people.

Immigration: America, is truly the great melting pot, Immigration has made us strong. But, today we have people who are entering the country for the wrong reasons or illegally. These un- documented immigrants are undermining our economy and our security, as well as bringing in once controlled or eradicated diseases. Although many of these individuals just want to work and share in our wealth, others are penetrating our borders to do us harm. In short, we need to control our borders.

Economic foundation/Jobs: We have to fix our ailing economy before we can work on some of the other needs. America’s free trade economy is the engine that drives our country forward. When our economy is healthy it creates jobs, strengthens the dollar, and helps provide increased tax money to run the government. The vast majority of Americans are motivated, hard working individuals. They don’t want a handout, they want honest work. We need to reward American and foreign companies for creating jobs that can be filled with American workers.

Bail outs/ no more: What ever side of this bailout business you land on, the banks, car manufacturers, brokerage firms, and insurance agencies, need to know, after this “you are on your own”. Business must succeed or fail on the merits of their own efforts, and with their own capital. The American people will not be there to offer you a soft landing again.

War/ division: If and when America goes to war we need to be 100% sure it’s the only alternative and then we must stand united, behind our troops. There are real fundamental differences and threats in the world for us to be concerned about, any one of which could threaten our national interest and cause us to go to war or be attacked. Iran/Middle east/Israel, Korea, and others, all represent a real and present danger, we can’t ignore these realities or close our eyes to them.
As far as I’m concerned..It’s “ All in or All Out”. War is not the issue for politicians to play political poker with (and we better not let them). Let me repeat, war is a terrible, but sometimes necessary option. We should only exercise that option after all other options have been exhausted and then only to protect ourselves and our vital interests. However, if we do need to go to war, we need to do so to win it and get out.

Put America First: It’s important to be a good world citizen and it’s nice to help others, but let’s get our own house in order first. I’m not advocating that we turn our back on our friends, but put our needs first. We have a responsibility to our own citizens that surpasses that of our neighbors.

Energy Independence: We need to drill & reward alternates energy development: Drilling may have some sort term environmental downside, but so will a nuclear attack on us. The cost to our economy and national security out weigh other concerns. As a side note here, we also need to reduce our foreign debt dependence, much like reliance on foreign energy; it also makes us indebted and subservient to other nations

Build a bridge: It’s a small world, and we are only one player. We no longer wield the same economic and political clout we once had. Let’s drop the arrogance and begin building better relations with other countries (both economic and political)

Home land security: In short: “Beef it Up” ..Our citizens need to understand that we can’t stop every threat from getting thru. We must stop some before they start, and that can only be done with better intel, at home and abroad. As president Bush has repeatedly said: “we have to be right every time, and they only have to be right once” Forget the other items on this list if we can’t control this one. Because without homeland security its, none of the above may be possible, its game over.

It’s been said that freedom was never free, there is a cost. Other generations have paid the price to make America safe, to make America strong, and now it’s our turn. The election may be over but the hard work has just begun. Let’s bring back American pride and unity, like right after 9/11. Let’s begin to rebuild America “Brick by Brick”. We can make her stronger and better than ever.
P.I.B.
Feel free to contact me at pooritalianboy@gmail.com

BREAKAWAY REPUBLIC

BREAKAWAY REPUBLIC

“Love it or leave it”…..The same advise I’d give you about your wife or your country.
Anyway, I got to thinking about this whole thing when Alex Baldwin, Cher, and a bunch of other actors began saying that, if their candidate didn’t get elected they would just as soon leave the country. I mean, these guys have a ton of money and they can pretty much live like a king anywhere they decide to go, but what about the rest of us. (we have feelings too, right ?)

Come to think of it, I’m not too excited about my property taxes, and I would have liked a bigger refund from I.R.S. last year, so what’s my remedy? This got me thinking about the whole idea of creating a breakaway republic. Just like the former Russian states, Czechoslovakia, and countless others, we could just part ways with the rest of the country. I could start a new utopia, a place where government served the people. ( a place with no taxes) A group of like -minded people could all create their own little country (kind’a like Monaco) and not have to toe the party line. It would be great, only people who thought and voted just like me would be allowed.

Since I live in Florida, that would be perfect.( I wouldn’t even have to move, or learn a new language) So, I drew up a petition for the State of Florida to secede from the Union. The sunshine state could easily stand alone. In fact, we could require a passport and charge an entry fee to every one driving in from Michigan, New York, and Canada. So, I drove around the state trying to get 500,000 signatures, to show the Feds I meant business. After a month or so,(and a lot of gas money) I decided to kind’a put that idea on the back burner. The concept was good, and I met a lot of nice people, but I fell a few signatures short ( about 499,998 to be exact...many thanks to the fellow sleeping under the bridge in Fort Myers)

Ok, I guess the whole Florida thing is off the table for now, so I focused my attention on the next most logical alternative. I rented a boat over in Fort Lauderdale and took a little cruise over to the Bahamas’. I was greeted there with great fan fair and after buying a straw hat and getting my hair braided at the dock, I spent the rest of the day talking to local officials. It turns out they are doing fine and really don’t want any more obnoxious Americans on their island. (Unless they come over by cruise boat and leave by 4pm each day).

Not one to be easily discouraged, I immediately went to my back up plan. Maybe I could rent some space from our neighbors to the north. (they have a bunch of space they are not using). The Canadians liked the idea (but said not to send anymore draft dodgers, or medical marijuana users their way) and offered to trade me equal space if I would throw the state of Florida into the deal, (because half of their citizens have a second home there anyway). I felt the deal was a little too rich for my liking, so I thanked them (had a few Molson’s, took in a hockey game) and left.

To be honest, I was kind of running out of ideas, until I took a little trip south of the border. Just south of the Rio Grand was the perfect spot, and the Mexican government couldn’t have been happier. I was offered a 99 year lease on a tract as big as Arizona, that we jointly decided to name “Tex-Mex”. It was only after I carefully read the fine terms of the lease that killed the deal. The wanted me to construct a giant wall along the entire southern border of the newly formed state, to keep the new residents from border jumping into Mexico. They also said they wanted to reclaim the land, any infrastructure or improvements, and have me throw in the State of Texas when the lease expired. (what’s fair is fair)

Well, after a lot of thought and soul search, I’ve decided that maybe it’s just going to be easier to work within the system that we already have in place. I may not agree with every politician that comes to power, and every new law that is put on the books; but after looking at the alternatives, we really have it pretty good here.
Please feel free to contact me at pooritalianboy@gmail.com
P.I.B.

THE DEMISE OF AMERICA

THE DEMISE OF AMERICA

OK, let me start off by saying that I love this country. I have wanted to write this article for a while, but held off until now. I remained silent in fear that others would see me as anti-American, or somehow less than patriotic, nothing could be father from the truth. America has been the greatest country and social experiment in history. I could easily recount the epic battles and milestones that this country has survived and overcome, but things have changed. It is time for Americans with courage to speak up and take action. We need to put aside partisan politics and do what’s right for our country.

There will be those among you who after reading this will consider me a pessimist, a naysayer, or even worse. I can only say that the truth is sometimes painful. The greater danger, the real disservice to my country, would be for me to bury my head in the sand and keep waiving the flag, while uttering pleasantries about times gone by. I have written many articles expounding on my patriotism and love for these United States, but now my duty lies in illuminating the not so subtle signs of our demise. Without action by well meaning citizens, and if left un-checked; we will spiral downward. Freedom was never free, it takes action, it takes vigilance and commitment; it must be nurtured.

For those of you who won’t open your eyes, for those of you that don’t believe we have headed down a slippery slope; keep your head in the sand, go over a read a blog about Paris Hilton or the Easter Bunny. Let me be blunt, America is in a state of decay, both economically, socially, morally, and in the eyes of other world leaders. Our citizens are deeply divided on many issues. If we continue down this path, we will be nothing more than a hollow shell, a paper tiger, a third world nation. Military might alone does not make a nation right or great. We do not need to follow this path.

History is replete with the demise of great world powers that had risen to power and splendor, only to waste away from the inside. Yes, I said from the inside, not by military defeat, not by natural disaster, but by loss of resolve and cohesion. Great Britton, China, Germany, The Soviet Union, and Rome have all given up their dominant positions in the endless ebb and tide of World Power. Most of them had turned their backs on their faith, had over extended their sphere of power and their military, and many had overspent their budgets (sound familiar?) In general, these once great nations moved away from the principles, concepts, and core believes, that once made them great.

The fall from greatness is seldom a rapid plunge, but is often a more insidious descent down a slippery slope of failed policies, false pride, inaction, and misdeeds. In many cases the populace becomes complacent and allows leaders and politicians to go unchecked. They stand quietly by and comply with or acquiesce to, actions taken by the government that move the country in the wrong direction.

Allow me to use a metaphor to illustrate my point:

Imagine America as a great fortress on a hill. This fortress that we call America, has been our home and kept us safe for a long time, it has been like a shining beacon to the rest of the world, it has allowed us to grow and prosper. The founders of our country were the original architects and engineers. Their need was great, their blueprint was sound. The plans were well considered and laid out, the foundation was strong. The builders were careful to avoid the haste and missteps taken by failed architects from other times and other lands. Over the years many a brave and insightful man has given much and lent a hand in building this great fortress, and many, too many, have given there life’s to insure its strength. This dream was created carefully, brick by brick to be the greatest shinning example the world has ever known.

Over time, new generations were handed the keys to this great fortress, but they did not labor and toil over its construction. They did not fully recognize or appreciate the blood and sacrifices of those that came before them. These same people have not given weight to the service and loss of life that some of their own generation, willingly gave, to insure the future of the fortress. Over time, the mighty fortress on the hill fell into disrepair, yet the citizens could not see the gradual changes. The fortress is strong and will always be there, they thought. Besides, we are too busy with our businesses and daily life to attend to these minor things.

Everyone can see what is happening, but it’s like taking down a great building one brick at a time. Some of the bricks are taken away one at a time by the town’s people with no ill intent. Maybe they just need a brick or two for their own homes. They feel they deserve a brick or two, after all they are citizens, or maybe they have intentions of replacing the borrowed brick one day. Can anyone fault them for that? Then there is another group that hates America, and wants us to fail, they are also silently chipping away in the shadows at the great wall, brick by brick. They realize that a sudden frontal attack on the fortress would fail, but few will notice if they chip away inch by inch.

It’s strange because surely the people who loved this magnificent creation would revolt, if the building was subject to the sudden attack of a wreaking ball, but this method is much more subtle, more sinister and insidious. Like a thief in the night, each brick disappears with hardly a notice (its only one brick, hardly cause for alarm, the politicians would answer. The fortress is still strong, do not worry) The masses do not even notice, and the few astute observers that do, are ignored, ridiculed or silenced. On a daily basis the building still looks sound and strong. How can the loss of a single brick affect the strength and structure of such a massive building? Brick by brick, day by day, almost unnoticeably, the fortress weakens, and over time it’s strength and foundation are under minded and the once great structure collapses. Where once stood a monument to its creators now stands a structure in need of repair.

I believe we have taken a giant step backwards in several key areas: (to continue my analogy)

Economics: We lost a brick when we let our steel manufacturing business go under, we lost a brick when we let our automobile industry become a second class player (and now on the verge of bankruptcy). And now more damage when the American dollar and American credit are in doubt and decline around the world.

Oil: We chipped away at our fortress when cut back domestic oil production, we did not invest in new refineries, and let trumped up environmental concerns keep us from drilling in the Gulf and ANWR. As a result we became almost totally energy independent on foreign sources.

Laws: We weakened the mortar when we allowed some of our civil liberties to be watered down

Politics: When deeply divided we weakened our foundation. It harms us to elect self serving and inefficient politicians into office, that vote down party lines; right or wrong. (these guys negate the vote of the true civil servants)

World community: We destabilize our structure when we let much of the world doubt our word, our resolve and strength.

Moral decay: We can undermine our entire base when we forget that this country was established with a belief in God.

America is still the only place I would want to live. I love this country but can no longer stand quietly by, because we have real problems that need to be addressed. Can we come out of it, can we return to greatness, can we turn this great ship around? Can we once again become the shining example for the rest of the world to follow? I submit to you that it depends on each of us. I ask you to make a personal decision: Are you going to be vigilant, working at the front gate of our fortress? Will you pledge your efforts and add a brick to rebuild and strengthen our country. Or will you join those in the shadows who would see us fail, or thru apathy, take another brick away ?

If you agree, disagree, or if you have a solution write me at: pooritalianboy@gmail.com . I’d like to include your ideas, when I write my article on “How to Rebuild America”

P.I.B.

BUY LOW- SELL HIGH

BUY LOW- SELL HIGH

Buy Low .. Sell High, such a succinct and simple investment concept. Almost makes it sound easy, doesn’t it ? But, as they say, if it was easy, everyone would be doing it. I have found that a low price is a subjective issue. My personal definition of a “low price”, is the cost of something that drops significantly shortly after I buy it. Car, house, stock…it doesn’t matter. In fact, sometimes I think I follow the Buy High, Sell Low strategy.

Let me be clear, playing the stock market is gambling, with more than a slight edge to the house. It may be playing with an educated guess, but its gambling none the less. Yes, over time many people make money in the market, but a lot of people loose and loose big.

The average small investor uses the buy and hold investing method (possibly better defines as, The buy and hope method). In the past, if you bought a stock and just held it long enough, you would make money. We’ve all heard the story of the little old lady who made millions because she bought IBM 40 years ago and just rode the price up. Well, I noticed on the internet this week that Gm said they had their worst year since 1945. Today, you can buy a stock and it will head down and never see your entry price again. (so much for buy and hold).

Of course, there are tons of T.V. info-mercial “investment experts”, that claim to be able to teach you the exact point to buy and sell at. It’s so easy, you can stay home and only work 15 minutes a day and be rich. I think, they are the only ones getting rich, pedaling that bull.

To be honest, I have to admit, that several years back, I fancied myself as a bit of a day trader. The market was soaring, and I was taking advantage of small daily fluctuations in stock prices. Buying and selling on a daily basis and actual making a few dollars. Now, I not trying to say that I was a Warren Buffet, or even a Jimmy Buffet, for that matter, but I was knocking down some frequent profits. The truth be know, I had diluted myself into thinking I was a stock trading genius.
(I still may be a genius, just not a stock market genius). Anyway the market changed and I got caught holding some stock that in retrospect, I just paid too damn much for. (still own it to this day..I’m consoling myself by saying its only a paper loss., but that’s like calling loosing an arm, a flesh wound)

Granted anyone can buy stock, any broker or internet trading site can execute a trade for you. The average investor buys on impulse, or because his brother in law gave him a tip. Maybe he has just read an magazine article on a dynamic new company, or he feels he is privy to some type of secret trading information. Others buy shares, because they just bought a hammer at home depot and had to wait in line 5 minutes for a cashier, so business must be good.


Another common misconception is that you can’t loose much trading in penny stocks (news flash: the reason they are selling for pennies is because they are shit). We’ll the thinking is that if I buy they stock for $1.20 a share, I can only loose a buck or so. The reality is, weather the stock costs $1.20 or $120.00 per share, when it goes to zero, you have lost your entire investment..(which is often the case..zero is zero)

Most of the stock market is driven by greed. Small investors are usually the greediest and the most emotional investors. They buy and stock and then refuse to sell it as they watch it plummet. They will ride the stock down, hoping it will go back to their purchase price, so that they won’t lose money. The large and institutional investors are cold hearted sharks, which have long since disposed of their emotions. They have stop losses in place as well as automatic trading triggers.
They manage their losses and take their gains, and leave the hoping and praying to the little guys.

Your probably receive calls from brokers all the time.. They always seem to have a stock or investment suggestion. Remember they get paid on trades, weather you make money or not. Also, they seldom will make you aware when they have a position in the very stock that they are encouraging you to buy. That represents what I would refer to as a conflict of interest.

There is a certain satisfaction in buying stock. In once sense you become a part owner in the company that you invest in, but don’t expect a key to the executive washroom. Your ownership has very little in the way of rights attached to it. You are more like a silent partner. Of course your one share or vote will entitle you to attend the annual stockholders meeting, but in reality, how many of us really attend. Unless you have a controlling interest in the company (translated: a hell of a lot a shares) you are just kind of along for the ride. Don’t expect a phone call every morning to fill you in on company objectives or to ask your preferences on important company matters.

Last but not least, don’t expect that just because a company has growing sales and profits ( or other solid fundamentals) that the stock value will continue to rise. There are a lot of other factors at work (like greed) Stock prices fluctuate on news: news of earning, political news, foreign news, the price of oil, and dozens of other factors that you or your target company has no control over. At the end of the day, the stock price is pretty much a supply and demand issue. You have group of potential buyers who think the price per share is a good value and that the company’s stock value is likely to increase, and you have a group of sellers that think the price is likely to stagnate or decrease and they want to unload some or all of their position. When both groups valuations merge, a sale is initiated.

Anyway, the old adage still holds true to make money: Buy Low and Sell high. The problem is pinpointing when the value is low and when the value is high. If I knew that, I have to change my name to the “Rich Italian Boy”.

P.I.B.

WHO REALLY WON ?

WHO REALLY WON ?

DATELINE: NOVEMBER 5TH 2008
“A house divided against itself, cannot not stand” … Abraham Lincoln

Finally the long awaited election is over. After 24 months and countless millions spent, we have a new president elect. To be honest, I try to stay away from politically charged articles on my blog because they tend to polarize people. But in this case I think the damage is already done. So, at the risk of being politically incorrect and insensitive, and possibly pissing off half of my readers..Here I go.
I’m not sure if the recent election served to help unite us, or just to further highlight the vast and deepening division that exists between American values and ideals. To be honest, I wasn’t that enthused with either candidate. Were these two guys really the best, and brightest, America had to offer ?
I can’t help but wonder what percentage of the voters, truly expressed their heartfelt endorsement of the candidate, and what percent cast their vote, only as a protest and to show distance to the last president’s policies. Even worse, how many voted for one candidate because they just didn’t want the other guy as president. (a default endorsement)
Personally, I think it’s important for America not to be driven too far to the left or the right. I also don’t find it healthy for one party to have an over whelming majority in the top offices. (President, congress, senate..it tends to drown out descent and opposing views) For my part, If a politician with an opposing view from mine gets in office, I have learned to grin and bear it. The truth is, as much as I may doubt the experience or capabilities of a candidate, I have rarely questioned their patriotism.
I’ve heard a lot about the word “Change” during this election. It seems, everyone is anxious for some change. I will be interested to see if this is little more than a campaign slogan, that will soon be left by the wayside, or an attempt at meaningful and positive change. Remember, all change is not good change. For the most part it’s easy to talk about change and promise change, but when the full weight, responsibility, and reality of the decision is at hand, sometimes change gets put on hold or is compromised.
Especially in regards to Iraq, I will be interested to see just what changes are actually made. Nobody wants to lose another single man over there, but to pack up and walk out immediately, would be strategic and logistical military blunder. Again, the reality of the situation might require a much more measured approach and timeline. The merits of the war can be argued, but the retreat from it must be a prudent and well planned military decision, not the result of keeping a rash campaign promise. War is not the answer to every world problem, but unfortunately when it is the answer, sometimes it’s the only answer. We need the wisdom and the courage to know when it is politically expedient and when it is unavoidable. I also feel that sometimes it must be pro-active. Hope is not a defense.
I also think we may have to re-think the whole 2 party political system and election process in this country, it’s too divisive. I think the majority of Americans are sick of this. Sick of the name calling, sick of the sound bites, and pre-programmed talking points, sick of daily reports by pollsters’ telling us who is in the lead, and tired of the “anything to win attitude”. I’m not sure we can stand another reversal of election results due to hanging chads or another popular vs. electoral college nightmare. My feeling is that the best possible candidates that the United States has to offer, are avoiding the job, they just don’t want to go thru the mud slinging and personal attacks. They can make much more money in the private sector and don’t have to endure making their lives, and those of their families, an open book.
We need a more inclusive system, and a much shorter election process, where we don’t end up with 50% of the population as being winners and 50% being losers. We need a change of mindset for those who always vote right down party lines from president to dog catcher. It’s been years since the country has stood strongly together behind a major politician or decision. We are too divided as a nation. It should not take a major catastrophe for us to come together as Americans. I want politicians to put America first, “all of America”, not their respective parties.

America is a great country, but we cannot rest on past accomplishments. Each generation faces its own challenges, and we are facing ours. I believe our best days are still ahead of us, but the path will not be an easy one, and there are many trials and tribulations in store for us. For the first time, in a long time, we have our hands full both at home and overseas. I’m confident the economic crisis will work its way thru the cycle after some more painful adjustments, but we are less in control of what other countries might do.
Let’s face it, there are people and countries out there that despise our way of life and mean us harm. To believe otherwise is unrealistic and naïve. Yes we can talk to them, yes we can negotiate, but it should be from a position of strength. I for one, do not want anyone mistaking our political bickering, partisan politics and infighting, for weakness or lack of unity. We should not let anyone doubt the resolve or cohesion of the American people, and to be honest, right now we are throwing off mixed signals.
At the end of the day, I’m kind glad that this only happens once every 4 years. I want to see the election decided by the people, not by the judges, lawyers, courts, media, or the best fund raisers. Our system may not be perfect, and it certainly needs some changes, but when it works right, it’s the citizens “who really win”.
P.I.B.

INSURANCE COMPANIES

INSURANCE COMPANIES

I’ve already told you, I’m a born in the wool capitalist. That means I think that given a free market system most things will tend to work out based on supply and demand. I also think that the “P” word …“profit” is not a bad word. People and businesses that work hard and provide a valuable product or service deserve to make a profit.

Ok, so if that’s the way I feel, then why do I get all flapped up about insurance companies ? Simple, it’s one of the few products or service that we as consumers pay for, and then get punished if we use the very product that we purchased. I think Americans might just be over insured. We buy insurance for auto, health, dental, life, boat, motorcycle, home owner, business interruption, errors and omissions, flood, collision, property casualty, uninsured motorist, and inland marine.

Let me explain: you buy a car insurance policy that will cover you damages in the event that you are involved in an accident. Well, you faithfully make your premium payments for months or perhaps years and the unexpected happens, you are involved in an accident.

Ok, so…you call in your claim, and the insurance company steps forward and pays it (actually they drag the damn thing out for 6 months and then pay only a portion.) They often will send out an “adjuster” (I promise I’m not making this up, check out the definition of adjust in the dictionary) to change (something) so that it fits, corresponds, or conforms; adapt; accommodate: to adjust expenses to income… Anyway he basically adjusts the claim to what they want to pay…

In any case, when renewal time rolls around you find yourself canceled or at the very best with a large rate increase. (reason: you collected on the policy that you bought and paid for, and now you must be punished)

Oh, insurance companies will cry and complain that their profits are under pressure (they learned this from bankers), yet ..if you look up in any large city, the biggest buildings are owned by banks and insurance companies (actually, the banks have their names on the buildings but they are owned by the insurance companies). Yes, those very same fella’s that are for ever whining about their rates and profits.

I tell ya one thing for sure. The insurance companies have hired themselves the finest lawyers that money can buy. If you doubt that for even one second, just read thru the fine print on any insurance policy. They list of exceptions and exclusions (read that: reasons you won’t get paid) will amaze you. You will soon be wondering, what if anything does this darn policy actually cover ? Just count the amount of “ifs”, “how-evers”, “forever forths”, acts of God,and “buts” you find in your contract.

I’m wondering what life would be like if other businesses started to use the same kind of contracts and set of “exclusions” as the real pro’s, the insurance companies use.

THE RESTAURANT: For starters, they would have a one page menu, followed by 25 pages of legal
jargon. Also, they would make you take a physical before you ate so that they
could document the fact that you were already a fat bastard with high
cholesterol before you choked down their slop. Hey…I just want’a to know, how
much the darn biscuits and gravy are, after all deductibles and co-pays.

The GAS STATION: Please insert your credit card to start the transaction. Thank you, now please insert your right index finger for fingerprint I.D. and blood test. Thank you, please blow into the sanitized straw, so that we can check your blood alcohol levels. Almost done, now please bend over and grab your ankles….( sound familiar insurance fans ?)

The NEW CAR DEALERSHIP: Due to matters beyond our control and other acts of god, you must sign our waiver of liability before walking on our lot. Also, we have included a “ryder” and ancillary stipulations that insure that you must test drive and purchase a car before you leave the lot. All vehicles are sold where is an as is (ok, that is a real car lot line), and become the full responsibility and liability of the purchaser upon crossing our lot line.

Ok, you get the drift. Insurance companies are in the risk business. The better they are at assessing the risk, managing the risk, avoiding the risk, and pooling the risk, the more money they are going to make. Their analysts and researchers have charts and tables based on historical claims and payments. They know the odds of getting in an accident in a red car compared to a white car. They know the average life span of a male smoker weighing 156 pounds and a women non smoker weighing in at 110 pounds. And they know the risks associated with skydiving as opposed to kite flying.

For the most part, I spend too much money on insurance and I’m probably over insured. I often wondered if I could have just kept all that premium money if I would have been better off.

P.I.B.

TO LEAD GREAT MEN

TO LEAD GREAT MEN

The role of leadership, although often sought, at times avoided, and is sometimes thrust upon us, or is awarded by default.

By whatever method you enter the leadership role, the mere assumption of the title will not insure the esteem of your people. At best, you may have their attention, but you must earn their loyalty and respect.

I can think of few higher callings than to lead great men. It is an honor and a privilege. And to think of it as any less, puts into doubt your very ability to assume the role. It takes great strength to be a leader, to lead from the front, and by example. The leader must be willing to acknowledge the contributions of his team to accomplishing any objective.

A great leader is a conduit, to channel the combined energy, intellect, ideas, and actions of his people. The leader, in turn, gives direction, vision, and discipline and produces the connection that allows his team to act in focused, cohesive manner. He helps the team move toward a common goal.

He creates a bond of trust and common cause with his men and they reward him with uncommon loyalty. The will not let him down, and he, not them.

This is what it means to lead great men.

P.I.B.

IDENTITY THEFT

IDENTITY THEFT

To start with, when you are an Italian boy from New Jersey, the concept of theft is not foreign to you. In my life, I have witnessed and been the victim of many types of theft. I hate to admit it, but when I was a kid I actually stole a pack of baseball cards from a small store. Of course when my dad found out the same day, I was back in the store with a full apology, the money for the cards, and a very sore backside. I learned a painful lesson early on.. “crime doesn’t pay”

In general, theft seems more rampant today, then it did when I was a kid. Back then it seemed real theft or, grand theft, was reserved for the pros, the mob, and the gangs. Today, theft is rampant in all socio-economic sectors of our society. Some do it for the money, some for the thrill, and some to pay for drugs. (some do it for a living..even in politics) Anyway you look at it theft is wrong. It unjustly deprives someone of their rightful belongings.

There is petty theft, industrial theft, car theft, grand theft, home invasion, auto theft(over 1 million), and countless other injustices. One of the most common forms of theft today is identity theft (just look up theft in google and see what comes up). Authorities are calling it an epidemic, effecting over 10 million people a year, and the fastest growing crime in the country. It is white collar theft, for people who don’t want to break into houses, banks, and cars at night. There are even commercials on T.V., from companies whose sole business is protecting your identity. I guess you can never be too careful. I have locks on all my doors, an alarm system, I park my car in the garage, bought two Dobermans, and wear one of those steel chain deals on my wallet, and now… I have to worry about my identity being stolen ? Give me a break, What’s next?

Credit car theft seems to be one of the biggest targets in the identity theft game. I know its getting bad because every time I go to use my credit card they have to call the credit card company to grill me on the phone. Even my own mom makes me answer her three security questions before she will talk to me on the phone.

Wow…with everything I have to worry about, now I have to protect my identity. I’m not even sure why anyone would want to be me. That’s all I need right now, is a posse of counterfeit Poor Italian Boys out there. (pretenders..and wanta be P.I.B.’s) And why, its not very glamorous to be me. There are days where I’m not even sure I want to be me. I mean you would think they would want to steal the identity of some rich movie star.. Stealing my identity is like stealing a Volkswagon. I would think any decent criminal would want to steal an important guy’s identity. (so much for taste) Yet the guy on T.V. says to protect my identity, so I better take heed.

I’m no fool, now that I’ve been warned about this whole identity theft thing, I’ve taken some immediate precautions to make sure I don’t fall victim to it. For starters, I went out and bought a long hair wig, along with a pair of those fake glasses with the plastic nose attached. Next I decided to change my name from P.I.B. (Poor Italian Boy)..to P.I.B. (Poor Iraqi Boy)..that should throw those would be thieves a curve ball. To really throw them off their game…I’m thinking about using a fake British accent on the phone, so that the “evildoers” won’t be able to know its me..when they “ring me up on the tele”. I’ve even snapped one of those bullet proof master locks on my trash cans and mail box to make sure I’m not the victim of prying eyes and dumpster diving (ps…if you do this, remember to give the garbage man and mailman a key…I haven’t had any mail or garbage pick up in a month).

I’m also told I have to be careful when I’m using my computer on the internet. Savvy would be computer thieves are “phishing” to criminally acquire my sensitive information. If I catch them I will stick my “phsoot where the phsun don’t phsine ”.They will send you an official looking e-mail or form asking you for security purposes to verify your bank account or social security number.

I’m also wondering if I can turn the tables on these identity thieves (or: future America’s most wanted stars)…if they steal my identity, then can I forward all my collection, stockbroker, and donations calls, along with my gambling debts over to them also. You never know… They may end up wishing they were not me…

B.I.P. (that’s P.I.B. encrypted)

AUTOMOTIVE PSYCHOLOGY 101

AUTOMOTIVE PSYCHOLOGY 101

Most Americans have an infatuation with their cars. For most people their cars represent their second largest single investment, next to their homes. Our cars are very important to us. They represent our personality, our status, and in many cases tell others a lot about ourselves. We own big cars, small cars, muscle cars, economy cars, and luxury cars. We buy two door, 4 door, SUV’s, sports cars, station wagons, and convertibles. We want a car that lends itself to our lifestyle. Cars offer us freedom, mobility, and sometimes just a way to escape.

I maintain that there is another dynamic in play here in addition to our clear obsession with our automobiles. Being the astute observer of human nature that I am, I’ve noticed a closely linked psychological phenomenon. I call it “Automotive
Dissociative Identity Disorder or ADID .(not to be confused with its close cousin Schizophrenia

This disorder is very prevalent in our society, effecting a large portion of our driving population both male and female. It derives from and is characterized by the fact that every human vehicle operator has two distinct personalities. We have our normal everyday social demeanor, and then when our car door closes, we assume our savage, antisocial, primitive and combative driving posture.(talk about your Dr, Jeckle and Mr, Hide)

Although this insidious affliction manifest itself across a broad cross section and spectrum of our driving population, it seems to infect female drivers most dramatically.(including the sub-category.. “little old ladies”)

I’ve already paid homage to the entire female race (just to be on the safe side, least I meet one in traffic), in a previous blog. It doesn’t hurt my male ego to admit that women may be better than men at some things. But I gott’a tell ya, driving aint one of them. Something magical, almost mythical happens when a women closes that car door. All that kindness, compassion, and higher level thought, gets left at the curb.(a comparison to Atilla the Hun would not be completely out of order here)

Although the behavior modification needs no other trigger other than a simple turn of the ignition key, the condition is often exacerbated by parking lots, heavy traffic, tailgaters, and other driving dumb asses. Symptoms are often manifested in abnormal and anti-social behavior such as: yelling, chanting of all four letter words, cussing, prolonged and uninterrupted use of the car’s horn, swerving past and dangerously close to the offending vehicle, and of course vehement and liberal use of the middle finger (except in the case of the arthritic old lady drivers and they shoot you the hook)

Even though there is currently no one cure for “Automotive ADID”, I now market several cures. First I have devised a driving with the fingers reinforced with wire, it gives you a great grip on the wheel and will not let you extend your middle finger. And my new breakthrough, an herbal supplement (not yet approved by the FDA) laced with Captain Morgan (available at drug/liquor stores everywhere, or on my website ..distributors welcome), to mask the symptoms.
Simply insert one tablet (rectally if possible) before pulling out of you driveway
And it acts with a reverse Viagra effect. Keeping the blood from rising to you face and middle finger.

Ps: the tablets are most effective when coupled with my Doctor P.I.B. phone counseling and anger management sessions, only $300 per hour.

P.I.B.

WHO WOULD I VOTE FOR

WHO WOULD I VOTE FOR
The presidential elections are right around the corner and talk of politics is on everyone’s minds. I’ve had friends ask me recently..Who would you vote for?
As far as I’m concerned I vote for the quality of the person. I don’t really care about the party affiliation, religion, gender, or race. What I’m interested in is…can I trust the person, and does he/she have the ability to do the job. Can the individual display loyalty, leadership, courage, and good decision making. I want to know how they react under pressure or fire. Will he/she face or run from danger or controversy. Would he or she be willing to put lives, even his own life on the line for our country.
I may be wrong but my thinking is that it’s easier to learn the political side of the job than to grow a backbone, or develop strong moral direction. I also want to know what life experiences the candidates have had to test their metal, what adversities have they overcome.
When it comes down to it and the president has to make a decision, that only the president can make, I want a guy with honor and integrity. At that moment, law degrees, popularity, and a great haircut don’t mean a thing. The president must be among the best that America has to offer.
I’m reminded of a story that exemplifies these very traits:
It was a pitch dark night, looking out into nothingness. It’s the kind of night that you might only know if you were out in a small boat, miles from any light of land. There in the dead quiet you could hear the sound of the waves lapping up against the hull of the wooden boat. It was evident that she was built for speed and not comfort or strength.
It must have been hard for the young skipper and crew to have remained focused, while being lulled by the long dark night. Suddenly hours of boredom turned to shear panic as another ship steamed towards the small boat. There was no time to get out of the way, and the collision ripped the plywood boat completely in half.
The skipper surveyed the damage and gathered the survivors, with little more than a few life jackets and a lantern and made the decision to try and swim for a small nearby island. Soon the effects of the collision and hours in the water took its toll on the will and bodies of the small group of men. Some wanted to just give up, but the strength and determination of the skipper gave them hope, as he literally pulled some of them along behind him. Hours later the exhausted group reached the safety of a small island, but only after being cut to shreds by the coral reef that guarded its shores.
As welcome as the feeling of land was, the skipper knew his men needed water, food and medical attention and he knew that no one would find them on the island in time. As daunting and treacherous as the ordeal was to reach the island, he decided the only way to save his men was to swim back out to the shipping channel with the small lantern, in hopes of signaling a rescue boat. I can’t imagine the strength it took to swim back alone, in the dark, against powerful currents, out in shark infested waters, so far from home.
The ordeal went on for some time, island after island, one futile attempt after another, draining the strength and will from each of the survivors, until by chance some friendly locals helped bring them to safety.
Who would get my vote for president. A man with the heart, strength, and values, like the skipper of that boat, except I was not able to vote for him, you see, he was tragically killed while I was still a young boy. . The story above happened in 1943, the place..south pacific..the boat PT109, the man..naval officer John F Kennedy, and latter our 35th president.
P.I.B.