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ME TOO
Another exhausting 12 hour work day, followed by paperwork, bill paying, and household chores. Finally fall asleep with a half dozen unfinished things on my mind. only to wake again to the alarm clock at 4:45 am, Sound familiar ? I swear there are just not enough hours in the day. I mean, there is only so much one man can do.
The more I think about, the only real solution, is if there were two of me. Now that’s an interesting concept. Life would be so much easier, if there were two of me. The two concept opens up a whole world of possibilities. Wouldn’t it be neat if you could g down to the local clinic and have them swab the inside of your check or something and take a DNA sample.(I’m not giving up a rib or anything like that). Then you could come back in a few days (or one hour or less..for an additonal $50 bucks), and there you would have a perfect clone of yourself.(hey, does this thing come with a warranty) Can you imagine taking him/her home the first day…it would be like a kid with a new puppy….What do you mean you’re hungry already.
Of course, since this is unplowed ground, I guess things could be kind’a awkward at first. I mean, who gets to ride shotgun on the way home. And boy, that son of a gun looks just like me (handsome devil). I’m gonna need a way for people to tell us apart. Maybe a button, forehead tattoo, lapel pin or something. Anyway, I can figure that out latter.
First of all, I’d have to make sure that my clone know who the boss is. I mean, if he didn’t, he wouldn’t be much help at all. So we would have to get that part straight right away. I’m the boss, numero uno, the big kahuna..GOT IT…In fact lets refer to each other as number one, and number 2, me and mini me?, me and me too. or perhaps Me1 and Me2 .
Ok, now that we’ve got that squared away, lets have some fun. I think the first thing I need to do is to make Me2 a schedule. I mean, if he just follows me around all day, what’s the sense of having him. Let’s see now, I should split up the responsibilities equally…one of us has to go to work every day…hmmm..that will be you #2. And then of course, there’s cutting the lawn, taking out trash, washing the car, waiting around for the a/c repair man that should be there between 9am to 5 pm, all events where I have to wear a jacket and tie, getting the drivers license renewed, my dentist and colonoscopy appointments, the laundry, dinner with the mother in law, and walking the dog. Ok, you win, those will all be on your plate.
And that leaves me to unfettered to shoulder the other tasks and heavy responsibilities that a man just has to do, including: fishing, golf, Saturday afternoon at Hooters,Stallone movies, working on my tan, tennis lessons, Nascar races, the gym, sleeping in late, poker nights, and otherwise carrying on. Boy, its rough being me.
Don’t worry #2, just to show you that my hearts in the right place you can have 5 paid days off a year and free medical, but you’ll definitely be on call for weekends and holidays. I’ll even send you a card, and maybe a tie or something, on our birthday.
Until Latter
P.I.B.
Another exhausting 12 hour work day, followed by paperwork, bill paying, and household chores. Finally fall asleep with a half dozen unfinished things on my mind. only to wake again to the alarm clock at 4:45 am, Sound familiar ? I swear there are just not enough hours in the day. I mean, there is only so much one man can do.
The more I think about, the only real solution, is if there were two of me. Now that’s an interesting concept. Life would be so much easier, if there were two of me. The two concept opens up a whole world of possibilities. Wouldn’t it be neat if you could g down to the local clinic and have them swab the inside of your check or something and take a DNA sample.(I’m not giving up a rib or anything like that). Then you could come back in a few days (or one hour or less..for an additonal $50 bucks), and there you would have a perfect clone of yourself.(hey, does this thing come with a warranty) Can you imagine taking him/her home the first day…it would be like a kid with a new puppy….What do you mean you’re hungry already.
Of course, since this is unplowed ground, I guess things could be kind’a awkward at first. I mean, who gets to ride shotgun on the way home. And boy, that son of a gun looks just like me (handsome devil). I’m gonna need a way for people to tell us apart. Maybe a button, forehead tattoo, lapel pin or something. Anyway, I can figure that out latter.
First of all, I’d have to make sure that my clone know who the boss is. I mean, if he didn’t, he wouldn’t be much help at all. So we would have to get that part straight right away. I’m the boss, numero uno, the big kahuna..GOT IT…In fact lets refer to each other as number one, and number 2, me and mini me?, me and me too. or perhaps Me1 and Me2 .
Ok, now that we’ve got that squared away, lets have some fun. I think the first thing I need to do is to make Me2 a schedule. I mean, if he just follows me around all day, what’s the sense of having him. Let’s see now, I should split up the responsibilities equally…one of us has to go to work every day…hmmm..that will be you #2. And then of course, there’s cutting the lawn, taking out trash, washing the car, waiting around for the a/c repair man that should be there between 9am to 5 pm, all events where I have to wear a jacket and tie, getting the drivers license renewed, my dentist and colonoscopy appointments, the laundry, dinner with the mother in law, and walking the dog. Ok, you win, those will all be on your plate.
And that leaves me to unfettered to shoulder the other tasks and heavy responsibilities that a man just has to do, including: fishing, golf, Saturday afternoon at Hooters,Stallone movies, working on my tan, tennis lessons, Nascar races, the gym, sleeping in late, poker nights, and otherwise carrying on. Boy, its rough being me.
Don’t worry #2, just to show you that my hearts in the right place you can have 5 paid days off a year and free medical, but you’ll definitely be on call for weekends and holidays. I’ll even send you a card, and maybe a tie or something, on our birthday.
Until Latter
P.I.B.
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